What does it take? A month and a half hiatus from a blog I didn’t even have to commit to, yet felt guilty every time I saw it in the top bar of my browser? A month and a half so that people half-heartedly check for updates, and then when those updates are nonexistent, and eventually they just lose all interest. The cycle is seen everywhere. With bands that just fade away after an amazing, fresh debut album, or that TV show with a hilarious pilot that just never airs again. Where’d it go? What happened? But eventually…you move on, get over it, and that obsession you held for a couple weeks is just a distant memory jogged only by late night thoughts.So what does it mean if you want people to lose interest? If you want to be the memory that everyone rarely thinks of? The memory that occasionally one stumbles on, but then shoves to the side because, well, now it’s just not important. So long have I strived to be important, to be known, to be wanted and loved, but now it just seems best to be forgotten among this crowd. High school reunion shmeunion. So many times have I repeated the college clause, the “everything will be different” statement that it’s started to affect my every move. Maybe I am spending the weekends running my own TV marathons while the regulars are going to the typical weekend party. A year ago I would’ve cared. Today I’ve lost all interest.
This apathy is downright pathetic, when I really don’t want to make the effort anymore to find new things about this place. Things I’ve started to realize, or things I’ve taken for granted all these years that suddenly seem so new. Still, these are things that I’m too lazy or noncommittal about to actually experience or to try. Or the things that have always been there, that have always been postponed for “later, later,” but the later has arrived and still I’m just not feeling it.
Well, blog, I’ve missed you—kinda. Let’s keep this one short and see how things go. Because I might be forgotten to you, but to me, I'm still important.
